The purpose of a contract is to provide an agreement which clearly specifies the behavior expected and the rewards that can be earned. It is written in simple language (or pictures for small children), is displayed publicly, and helps the parties involved remember the terms of the agreement. Often such an agreement is posted somewhere in easy view and can be used for recording daily behavior change, such as earning gold stars or points. With young children, parents usually set up a contract on the basis of what they already know about rewards for their children. With older children, parents may need to negotiate a contract that is, specifying what they want the children to do, exploring what the children would like to earn, and agreeing upon a fair system of behavior and rewards.

Parents may have to spend considerable time with the children in negotiation because of disagreements about the value of rewards (children sometimes arc unrealistic about the cost of material things), and the amount of effort that should go into earning them. Like management and labor, parents and children can usually reach an agreement and can finally ’sign’ the document to show good faith. If the terms of the contract are carried out by the child, parents must follow through on their end of the bargain. If either party cannot abide by the agreement, the contract Mould he terminated and a new one drawn up. It is usually, best to make a contract for only a short period of time (a week or two), since experience may find it to be too easy or too difficult.

Even the best contracts have to be reassessed every now and then. Having a written contract is valuable because it requires a positive focus, serves as a visual reminder of the agreement, and keeps both parents and children on target.

In carrying out such a contract, Mother in4y wish to check the room with Sally in the afternoon just before her daily snack time. She already knows Sally likes biscuits, chocolate milkshake and fruit. Yet, it may be neccessary to prompt Sally at first, re-explain and show her how to do each of the things shown in the pictorial contract, using the step-by-step principle. After a couple of days, Sally should be able to manage without further instruction, depending on her age and physical skills (and upon the degree of perfection her mother expects)!

A number of assumptions are included in this example of a contract. First, the child must know exactly what the tasks involve (when defined as ‘bed made’ or ‘table cleared’). Second, the parents will have to decide which the more important aspects of behaviour to them are and which seem to be the easiest. Points are then weighted accordingly. We are also assuming that the sister who is being ‘insulted’ is able to focus positively and determine, on an hourly basis, whether she was insulted or not. (The problem behavior is `insults’, which are easy to count, but that would be negative focus. The sister must be able to record time without such insults so that the family may reward it.)

In the sample contract, the child gets a choice of how to cash in earned points. There is a long-term ’special reward’ included so that, after 150 total points are earned, a party can be given. Such events happen occasionally in most families anyway, so why not include a party for a special reward? The chart shows daily progress and steps towards the big reward. If the child is doing a good job on most items, the parents may allow self-monitoring (or self scoring) and marking-up of points (with occasional checks for accuracy). The whole thing finishes about three week later (an older child may be able to handle this longer period), and may be reassessed at that time if necessary.

Remember, in forming a contract:

1. Pinpoint the desired behavior.

2. Whenever appropriate, state the checking time when the improvement in behaviour has to be completed. Just saying ‘feed the dog daily’ could mean any time within 24 hours.

3. State the behavior with a positive focus.

4. Clearly specify what the rewards are, their cost, and when they will be given.

5. Place the contract in a public place for all to see. Most children really like earning things and seeing their progress publicly displayed.

6. Re-evaluate the contract on a weekly basis to determine effectiveness. If necessary, new reward values can be assigned to desired behavior. For example, if an improvement in behavior is not occurring at all, the reward may be too small and can be increased.

Contracts are a common means of adult communication. They require both parties to be clear about their desires and expectations, and they specify both rewards for successful completion and penalties for failure. If we are to improve communication with children, such clear statements can be of value. Although a written contract is not always necessary (just as it is not always necessary between adults) dues allow for fewer misunderstandings. Also, a written contract says to both parties’ `We are serious about changing things here!’

Just as parents socially reward children, children socially reward us as parents: by doing what is asked of them having a generally cheerful disposition, smiling and laughing, acting excited and happy when they see us, showing affection, and imitating our behavior – in short, by making us feel needed and loved.

As children grow into the teenage years there is often a marked change in their world of social rewards. They have many friends at school, an entire social structure outside the social rewards more than those at home. Parents often wonder what happened. They feel that their children no longer consider them so important. There may he some truth in this but if parents give a lot of social rewards (even to teenagers), it is reasonable to expect that teenagers will reciprocate. Teenagers can socially reward parents by showing affection (although perhaps toned-down), having a sense of humour, talking about their lives, showing interest in what their parents are doing, and not treating them as if they were horribly old-fashioned.

Finally, this principle applies not only between parents and children but is true with any two individuals, brother and sister, husband and wife, employer and employee, or friends.